Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Dear Snowbabies

Every three months I am reminded of my infertility when our statement from the cryopreservation clinic arrives in the mail.

We send off a check to keep you safely frozen in time.
I think about you daily.
Your brothers and I pray for you all every night before bed.

I wonder if you are boys or girls. Would you have Gabe's brown eyes, or Nat's wild hair?
Would you love reading as much as your daddy, your brothers, and me?
But mostly I wonder if I will ever be blessed enough carry you -in my womb and in my arms.

I know there is a chance that I will meet you one day.
But stories and unhappy endings from others leave me broken-hearted and worried. I am not guaranteed anything. I may never experience a pregnancy with you. I may never look into your eyes.

If I never meet you here on earth, I know that I will hold you in my arms in heaven.

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